Just like when you and your ex-spouse were married, the way you work together to raise your children following a divorce doesn’t necessarily have to follow the rules that other couples have used. While there are some guidelines that can help you create solid lines of communication and better arrangements for your children, there is a great deal of flexibility in how you and your ex raise your children according to your own wishes.
Good coparents are coparents who can work together to support their children and provide them with healthy, happy home environments. Whether that means that you’ll nest in the original family home and keep your children in one place or you plan to live several cities apart, you and the other parent can choose how to raise your children.
You have to keep in mind your children’s best interests
The way you coparent may be different from other divorced parents, but you do have to think about doing whatever is in your children’s best interests. So, for example, you might think that relocating and cutting down on parenting time with one parent is a better option, but if that isn’t in your children’s best interests, the court will take issue with it.
As coparents, you need to think about what is best for your children. Would they do better if they could stay in the same home? Are they able to move between homes easily? Do the siblings need to be separated for a while, or can they be on the same custody schedule?
These and other questions should come up as you try to decide what will work.
Coparenting communication matters
Remember, too, that the way you communicate matters. Good coparents don’t drag their kids into arguments and do their best not to have visible conflicts that disrupt the children’s lives. That might mean that you need to communicate through text or email, or you and the other parent may get along well enough to chat each time you exchange physical custody.
Everyone is different. As you work through your divorce, you can talk with the other parent and your attorney about setting up a schedule and parenting plan that reflects your unique situation.